Control

You don't need to control everything.

On the contrary, you need to let go of the need to control everything.

Take control of your thoughts, make a plan, and then take control of that which you CAN control.

Let God have the rest.
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Too Perfect: When Being in Control Gets Out of Control

Compelled to Control: Recovering Intimacy in Broken Relationships

Losing Control Finding Serenity: How the Need to Control Hurts Us And How to Let It Go

Be Angry!

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger."
- Buddha

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This reminds me of another saying... Resentment (or anger?) is like swallowing poison to kill your enemy.

Anger isn't an unhealthy emotion.  So many on the path to enlightenment or who are working with the "Law of Attraction" fear being angry, worried that they will simply bring more negativity to themselves.  This is just untrue.

Now, don't get me wrong, if you skulk around all the time, pissed off at the world, then yes, you're going to attract negativity to you.  In a case such as this, anger is less an emotion and more a state of mind.

Anger as an emotion is not only harmless to your conscious creation, but sometimes essential.  Anger ignites fire within us.  Anger sets us in motion.  When anger doesn't set us in motion, then it becomes a state of mind.  When you're overcome with such a strong emotion, you need to act.

The Universe will not "punish" you for feeling anger... for being passionate enough about something to feel angry at the state of things.  But if you do nothing, and just hold onto that anger, the anger itself will punish you through the all consuming thoughts and feelings you will end up if you don't release it.

So BE angry!  If you see injustice, get pissed!  Ignite change!  Create passion!  Just remember that anger is the beginning.  When anger is the end, then you are punishing yourself.

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Great Titles at Amazon 

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A Dysfunctional Defense

Whenever anyone has offended me, I try to raise my soul so high that the offense cannot reach it.
– Rene Descartes

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It's funny how there's satisfaction in being offended.  It doesn't seem like there'd be anything to gain by being put down emotionally, and yet there is a whole world of self righteous indignation in it.

It gives us a chance to not only make ourselves "right," but also a chance to make someone else "wrong."

And what could feel better than making someone else out to be a total jerk?  I mean, look what they did to you!

But that's the thing.  They didn't ACTUALLY do ANYTHING to you.

Offense is a false construct of the ego.  The ego is endlessly obsessed with being better than others.  The ego is the part of us that sees us as separate from each other and from God.  Without that distinct acknowledgment of separation, the ego cannot exist.  And what could be scarier than not existing?

The truth is...

Everything and anything that anyone will ever or has ever done or said to you was 100% about THEM and THEIR ego and THEIR perception and thoughts.  It has nothing to do with you.  Not  One  Thing!

If I say I don't like Jane.  Jane is a bitch.  Does that make Jane a bitch?  Not hardly.  Actually, it sorta makes ME a bitch.

But what if Jane IS a bitch?  She's done mean things to me and said mean things to me and she IS a bitch!!

Let's assume Jane is my age, which makes her in her early 30s.  How many moments in time has Jane occupied?  How many deeds must she have preformed over her 30+ years.  How many things she must've said to so many countless people.

Yet here I sit, completely judging poor Jane based upon only a couple deeds or words that would amount to a drop of experience in a bucket full of life lived.

Should Jane take offense to my calling her a bitch?  No, of course not.  What I know of Jane, even if I've known her for her entire life, amounts to almost nothing.

But WILL she take offense?  Probably.

She would probably come clawing back at me with a loud, resounding denial of her bitchdom, and a distinct accusation of my own.  And then there we'd stand, in opposition to each other, fingers pointed, insisting that "You are BAD and I am GOOD!  You are WRONG and I am RIGHT!"

Does that make me good and right?  No.  Does that make HER good or right?  Nope.

Does it make us feel better about ourselves to throw around such accusations at each other?  You bet it does!

But why?  If thinking it and feeling it and saying it DOESN'T make it true in any way, then why does it feel so GOOD?!?!

Because we already believe those "bad" things about ourselves, and in the finger pointing, we are "proving" our righteousness to ourselves.  When we defend ourselves against the accusations of others, we're not thinking about any of the less than gracious things we've done and said.  We're only thinking about how GOOD we are and how BAD they are.

But if Jane knew who she REALLY is, she wouldn't give a hoot about the dysfunctional thoughts of ego and separation inside of my head.  She would understand that she is a divine child of God who is sublime in her creation and is untouchable by any words I may spit at her.

She would rise above my judgments knowing that I am only judging her based upon things I am terrified are real in ME.  And that by attempting to amplify those things in her, I assuage my own ego and assure it that the evil I see in her cannot be inside of me, fore I can clearly see it "out there" and in her.

The greatest gift you can ever give yourself is to know, beyond a doubt, who you REALLY are, and to understand that you are forever untouchable until you make the decision to be touched.  But you will never need to allow the accusations of others to touch you because in the knowing of who you really are, you relinquish the need to defend yourself against the dysfunctional thoughts of others.

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Great Titles by Rene Descartes 

Discourse on Method
Meditations on Philosophy

Meditations and Other Metaphysical Writings

Descartes
A Biography

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Do Unto Yourself

Too many people are living in a prison that they have themselves manufactured.
- Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith
 

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Your mind is given to you as a tool.  It is very useful indeed.  It allows you to contemplate and reason.  It allows you to plan and remember.

It also allows you to imprison yourself, held captive by shame and regret.  Beaten down by your own thoughts and rendered immobile in a belief that you are an undeserving failure.

Every time you beat yourself up, you cast another iron bar in your self imposed prison.  Every time you believe that little voice in your head that says unkind things, you allow demons to rule your world.

Imagine your child making a mistake and verbally abusing themselves for it.  As a parent, you would immediately rush in explaining that mistakes are just mistakes.  In short, shit happens.  But we all move forward and just intend to do better next time.

Why is that so hard to believe about ourselves?

Why do we believe that we should never slip up?  Why do we deny our human-ness.  Why do we understand and accept with grace and kindness, the mistakes of others while belittling and blaming ourselves?

I believe in the golden rule which says, "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you."  And I believe that generally speaking, we DO.

However, I think a more useful and accurate rule for the advancement of our own humanity and self love would be to "Do unto yourself as you do unto others."

Give yourself the same kindness and understanding as you do to others.  Don't berate yourself.  Don't hate yourself.  Any being that acts out in negatively perceived ways only does so out of fear.

Why would you bully someone who is afraid?

If you're disappointed in yourself, vow to change.  Vow to do better.  Vow to BE better.

But no one ever felt inspired to be MORE because they were bullied or belittled into it.  LOVE is what inspires.  Love is what transcends the mind and the mind made demons.

All you need is love.






The Beatles on Amazon.com

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Great Titles by Dr. Michael Bernard Beckwith  

Life Visioning

Spiritual Liberation

Inspirations of the Heart

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Embracing Changes

There are forces at work in your psyche which you cannot control.
They belong to a deeper and wiser part of yourself.
Sometimes it is essential to change an aspect of your life.
This is often the case if you are in a situation which is wrong for you or stagnating. If you resist change, your unconscious wisdom may give you a push by causing a disturbance in your life.
The shock you experience may therefore be a way of forcing necessary change on you.
– Sarah Dening

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 Change is the only real constant in our lives.  Energy is always in motion.

When we resist change, all we do is create discomfort for ourselves. We are always growing, and our perception is always changing.  When we try to remain steadfast in out perceptions when they're urging us to see differently, it creates pain.

When we go with the flow, and roll with the changes, and make the best of each situation while looking for solutions and comfort, we create an empowered and happy life for ourselves.

When we sit tight, insisting that we know everything, and we've reached our end, life tends to get more and more choppy around us.  Choppy and uncomfortable until our situation forces us into action and change.

Then once we change, our world levels out, and we find that peace and happiness again.  Even if only temporarily.  But our happiness is only temporary in this life model because we base our happiness upon our situation and circumstances.

Embracing the fact that life IS change creates an everlasting happiness that isn't dependent upon circumstances.  Knowing that change is ever coming toward you enables you to see your options and choose, instead of digging your heels in and refusing to move.

Change is exciting.  It's exhilarating to have endless options and choices, and the power to pick and choose and create.

Embrace your power to choose and change.  You have a guidance system inside of you to guide.  Allow it to show you the way.  It will never steer you wrong.

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Great Titles by Sarah Dening

The Everyday I Ching

The Mythology of Sex
Am Illustrated Explorant

Healing Dreams
How to Interpret Your Dream and Change Your Life

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Intending Unseen Miracles

When you embrace uncertainty and include intention and detachment,
then the most improbable happens. That’s what we call a miracle.
– Deepak Chopra

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Embrace uncertainty.  Knowing that even though you don't know what's going to happen, you can handle it and it's going to lead you somewhere great.

Include intention.  Knowing what you want to get out of the situation personally, no matter how it presents itself.

Detachment.  Being open to any way that God presents your intention in manifested form.  Not putting limits on the Universe because you believe things have to look or appear in a specific way.

All these things leave possibility WIDE open for us, and God creates miracles in ways we never would have imagined.  When you don't put limitations on yourself or God, the world, in its entirety, is at your complete disposal.

Fear not the unknown.  It is only opportunity waiting for you to allow it to unfold.

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Great Titles by Deepak Chopra

The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success

The Ultimate Happiness Prescription

The Spontaneous Fulfillment of Desire

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Pushing Boundaries

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.
– Ambrose Redmoon

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 Going to a movie by myself seemed silly to be afraid of, but I was. When I got there, my heart was pounding and my palms were sweaty and I felt SO out of place, like everyone was looking at me.

But I knew it was important. I knew I had to do something that was outside of my comfort zone.  I had to push my limits a little to make more space to become who I wanted to be.

The growth was more important than the fear.

The second time I did it, two weeks later, it was almost anxiety free.  I was the teeniest bit apprehensive when I first got there, but it only lasted a couple minutes.  I even ended up being the ONLY person in the whole theater during that movie.  It was weird, but not uncomfortable.

Facing fear head on has been important for me.  And every time I do it, the fear dissipates.  Sometimes a little slower, but each time I stare down fear and refuse to back down, it's always the fear that gives way a little more.

Have faith in yourself and know that you are bigger than any fear.

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Great Titles from Amazon

Love is Letting Go of Fear

Freedom: Letting Go of Anxiety and Fear of the Unknown

Chloe's Gift
A Parable for Teens and Young Adults
A Parable for Letting Go of Fear and Giving Love a Second Chance

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