– Madame De Maintenon
"Ha! You think YOU'VE got it rough, you should hear about MY life!"
Thoughts like that used to be my default. Anytime I heard someone begin to tell me about their trouble, my selfish, self centered mind would always go straight to my own trouble.
Then one day I was listening to one of the current day gurus (Dyer, Chopra, Abraham...) and they were talking about how we humans not only compete to be the BEST and SUPERIOR, but when we feel we can't be superior in our GOODNESS, we will resort to being superior in our LACK.
We've ALL done it. Someone begins telling us about a sticky situation of their own and we launch into how many "bad" things have happened to us, and how often, and how unfair it was, and about how it will probably happen again given our own, personal, self proclaimed bad luck.
This observation was an absolute epiphany for my tiny, little brain. I was immediately able to SEE it. I could nearly recount every single time I'd ever done that, because the bitch was always the same.
"Poor you?! No, poor ME!"
Now if you tell me your troubles, I will listen to you with compassion and love. I will give you my shoulder and let you lean on me because I am strong. I will help you find your own strength and power, and in my mind, I will never see you as anything but whole, complete, perfect, loved, and at peace.
When the troubles are your own and you look them square in the face, it's hard to see around them sometimes. Seeking comfort from another person can help you see your troubles from a different angle, and it just might turn out that once in perspective, the SIZE of your trouble was a trick of the eye and it's not nearly as imposing as you'd once thought.
We all have the power to see this about our troubles and we all have the power to BE that sight for others.
Don't compare their pain to yours in an attempt to diminish their fear, because that only diminishes their sense of validity in their feelings. Instead, help them to know that they are loved regardless and that someone is there for them and they're not alone.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pAyKJAtDNCw
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