– Rene Descartes
It's funny how there's satisfaction in being offended. It doesn't seem like there'd be anything to gain by being put down emotionally, and yet there is a whole world of self righteous indignation in it.
It gives us a chance to not only make ourselves "right," but also a chance to make someone else "wrong."
And what could feel better than making someone else out to be a total jerk? I mean, look what they did to you!
But that's the thing. They didn't ACTUALLY do ANYTHING to you.
Offense is a false construct of the ego. The ego is endlessly obsessed with being better than others. The ego is the part of us that sees us as separate from each other and from God. Without that distinct acknowledgment of separation, the ego cannot exist. And what could be scarier than not existing?
The truth is...
Everything and anything that anyone will ever or has ever done or said to you was 100% about THEM and THEIR ego and THEIR perception and thoughts. It has nothing to do with you. Not One Thing!
If I say I don't like Jane. Jane is a bitch. Does that make Jane a bitch? Not hardly. Actually, it sorta makes ME a bitch.
But what if Jane IS a bitch? She's done mean things to me and said mean things to me and she IS a bitch!!
Let's assume Jane is my age, which makes her in her early 30s. How many moments in time has Jane occupied? How many deeds must she have preformed over her 30+ years. How many things she must've said to so many countless people.
Yet here I sit, completely judging poor Jane based upon only a couple deeds or words that would amount to a drop of experience in a bucket full of life lived.
Should Jane take offense to my calling her a bitch? No, of course not. What I know of Jane, even if I've known her for her entire life, amounts to almost nothing.
But WILL she take offense? Probably.
She would probably come clawing back at me with a loud, resounding denial of her bitchdom, and a distinct accusation of my own. And then there we'd stand, in opposition to each other, fingers pointed, insisting that "You are BAD and I am GOOD! You are WRONG and I am RIGHT!"
Does that make me good and right? No. Does that make HER good or right? Nope.
Does it make us feel better about ourselves to throw around such accusations at each other? You bet it does!
But why? If thinking it and feeling it and saying it DOESN'T make it true in any way, then why does it feel so GOOD?!?!
Because we already believe those "bad" things about ourselves, and in the finger pointing, we are "proving" our righteousness to ourselves. When we defend ourselves against the accusations of others, we're not thinking about any of the less than gracious things we've done and said. We're only thinking about how GOOD we are and how BAD they are.
But if Jane knew who she REALLY is, she wouldn't give a hoot about the dysfunctional thoughts of ego and separation inside of my head. She would understand that she is a divine child of God who is sublime in her creation and is untouchable by any words I may spit at her.
She would rise above my judgments knowing that I am only judging her based upon things I am terrified are real in ME. And that by attempting to amplify those things in her, I assuage my own ego and assure it that the evil I see in her cannot be inside of me, fore I can clearly see it "out there" and in her.
The greatest gift you can ever give yourself is to know, beyond a doubt, who you REALLY are, and to understand that you are forever untouchable until you make the decision to be touched. But you will never need to allow the accusations of others to touch you because in the knowing of who you really are, you relinquish the need to defend yourself against the dysfunctional thoughts of others.
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| Discourse on Method Meditations on Philosophy |
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| Meditations and Other Metaphysical Writings |
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| Descartes A Biography |
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